Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy, today is the day that I will be leaving my house that I have been since 4 months ago. Frankly,I didn't know what I did during all those time,it felt like just yesterday I was happily packing all my stuff to move out from kuaz forevaar and know I am packing for my degree at uitm.
Distraught,anxious,sad,melancholic,and angst is the feeling that have been surrounding me for the past few days.If I can turn back the time,I want to do it all over again but I can't.It's IMPOSSIBLE. Yeah I know.
I'm gonna miss everybody plus everything and every little memories I'll remember and for sure I'm gonna cry during my first night without my family.I wish that time can stop. I don't know how people actually can survive this type of feeling you know...the feeling of leaving your family behind..it just never gets easier.
I think I'm gonna write all the things that I'd done for the past few months...
Thursday, 23 August 2018
Wednesday, 15 August 2018
Reminder For Myself
This is just a list of words that I tried to remembere yesterday,so I'm gonna write it up here just for fun..Oh and countdown to enter degree in less than a week..
- epitome
- tenure
- spearhead
- etiquette
- probe
- pragmatic
- labyrinth
- resilient
- amiss
- distraught
- strife
- bestow
- promise
- hog
- intermittent
- groggy
- ebb and flow
- conundrum
- hatred
- self-loathing
- loathe
- prevalent
- counter-intuitive
Tuesday, 7 August 2018
MENTAL BREAKDOWN
Devastated,hatred,self-loathed,anger and more is all that I think about myself for the past couple of weeks.In about 18 days I will be gone to pursue my degree at UiTM,and frankly speaking I'm not prepared to leave and I felt everything happened too fast and I can't appreciate any single thing that occured in my life.
The day UPU result was released which is on 30th July which happened to be the day of my birthday is where my life fallen apart.I got course that I try to avoid the most and got rejected from my universities that I wanted to be for the next 5 years.Oh and the most fun thing is I got the last choice of my option in the upu result.Claps!
So now,I just try to accept it and just believe that God has a better plan for me and maybe my luck/happiness/carrier/*anything that involve in a positive way is waiting for me.Honestly sometimes I felt that life is so UNFAIR,like some people just got whatever they want just like that,they're so lucky in any way,they have a happy decent life,everything seems to be so smooth for them,they don't have to experience all the difficulties,they don't have to work hard/keep asking for what they want and the list goes on and on.
But I know that probably my luck will come to me somebody and I just have to stay strong in order to face all the challenges that coming ahead and InsyaAllah one day everything will turn upside down and I will be free from this unfairness that I constantly felt.Amin.
The day UPU result was released which is on 30th July which happened to be the day of my birthday is where my life fallen apart.I got course that I try to avoid the most and got rejected from my universities that I wanted to be for the next 5 years.Oh and the most fun thing is I got the last choice of my option in the upu result.Claps!
So now,I just try to accept it and just believe that God has a better plan for me and maybe my luck/happiness/carrier/*anything that involve in a positive way is waiting for me.Honestly sometimes I felt that life is so UNFAIR,like some people just got whatever they want just like that,they're so lucky in any way,they have a happy decent life,everything seems to be so smooth for them,they don't have to experience all the difficulties,they don't have to work hard/keep asking for what they want and the list goes on and on.
But I know that probably my luck will come to me somebody and I just have to stay strong in order to face all the challenges that coming ahead and InsyaAllah one day everything will turn upside down and I will be free from this unfairness that I constantly felt.Amin.
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